Letting go doesn't mean giving up, it means accepting that some things weren't meant to be.
I was going to write something completely different for this week’s blog, in fact I was twisting my head around what to write about; then this came up. I want to talk more about money and the cycle of currency. This is a money mindset lesson I learned on Tuesday night during and after my shift. The strength of money is vast. I even heard a coworker recently state that she hates money. This goes back to money mentality from a previous post, but it’s interesting how this energy can really getcha! Especially when it come to the loss or theft of this money energy. The pain is so great that as a natural reaction we resort to anger. Well I take full accountability for my loses and thefts because I’m the individual that put myself in situations where I was taken from. It’s all to do with the consciousness or awareness of our surroundings.
It didn’t take much for me to lose consciousness of the energy I was in charge of: money. Being money-conscious is a wavelength on it’s own that, on this particular evening, I was not a part of. After a shift of dis-ease, I ended up losing a large quantity of money that left me going home with zero and more to pay out the store. It’s really really difficult to overcome a defeat like that. But at the time, it’s all said and done and nothing more could really become of it. The fact is that is just happened. What’s that famous phrase that Forrest Gump apparently coined?... Anyhow, after a day of sulking I’ve come to realize that this isn’t a defeat. I’m not fighting a war, and if I were, no one is winning.
Everything that’s taken from us is pain. In turn, everything we give or receive is a gift. Whether we like it or not, these gifts serve a purpose. I’m sure that someone found the money and decided to keep it. Who wouldn’t?, it’s cash money! Serendipity, baby! I know some are honest to turn it in and whether or not that may be... is a different point. The purpose is not that it was taken from me. I’ve had things taken away from me, and who hasn’t? From personal belongings to experiences to emotions can all be taken from us. Granted I don’t care for or appreciate being taken from. Rarely do I put myself in a position where people can rob of me. As when it does happen, I simply let it be. How often I have said that phrase is no accident. Truth, Paul McCartney?
By letting go, I’m not giving up or giving in but rather gifting into the flow of universal energy. These things, these possessions we have; do they really belong to us? It’s owned so it must never leave our grasp until it’s used up, juiced and ready to keel over. It’s a matter of holding on that keeps the flow from flowing. It’s like sailing a ship upwind: there’s not as much control, it’s more challenging to enjoy the journey, and to reach the destination should there be one. Sailing down wind; it’s easier to sway, there’s less resistance and one is able to enjoy the beauty of the ocean just by letting the ship be in flow. Which more sounds like a path for you? Upwind or downwind?
Money is the most powerful and influential source of energy we have. It’s the official bartering tool traded for goods & services, experiences and possessions. It’s no wonder it’s called “currency.” As the flows of the current take one to lands of beauty, I choose to let the money flow knowing that there is enough for everyone. The money I lost on Tuesday night went into to flow as someone may have needed it more than I. Thinking of being able to let it go and gifting it back into universal flow is a blessing. Thinking of holding on to it only makes me feel angry and bitter. Sad and sorrow. I trust the energy of that money upon it receipt will truly serve that person. I’m also confident that by my gifting it, it comes back to me. Well, it was found the next day by coworker and returned to management. I was able to receive it on my next shift. I am fortunate to have gotten it back. Though it never left the store, would I have had this insightful experience to share?
Why is it that human beings are so vulnerable to being taken from? Being able to feel that emotion let's us know we are alive. It was amazing the strength I had when I first realized it was gone. Two lovely gals I work with asked me how I can smile after what had just happened. I wasn’t sure myself, really, other than the fact that I know that all is laughable and not worth giving into anger. Yes, that does sound Jedi, yet is it not truth? After a day of dwelling, conversation and meditation, I’ve moved past it all. When we are stolen from, yes it does hurt. Consider it a gift to the universe like you just made a donation to noble cause. Just know that takers tend not to make it out of life alive. Givers gain. Holding on to that flow by holding on to the anger of loss is taking; stopping flow. Just let go and stay the course like Luke just used the force.
Friday, August 27, 2010
Friday, August 20, 2010
Luck Is Just a Little of It
Everything is we do in life based on feeling and then backed with logic. This is the way people tip. The whole idea of service is to give of self. In fact, deserve is a derivative term meaning ‘of service.’ The feeling you put out is that which you receive back. People tip monetarily based solely upon how they feel about themselves. This is something I’ve said to my coworkers for the past year. Though it’s perceived as pain, it’s absolutely nothing to do with you! A person can distinguish themselves as a person with a high value and look for the value in others, such as yourself, even when you might be having a bad day. The same goes with those with a low self worth. Do you think that someone with a low self worth has any worth in their wallet? And they’re sure not giving what little they have to you regardless of what you give to them.
Like any game, there are two players. Take into account that all of the players are responsible for the outcome of the game. If a person perceives you as loving and possess a high self worth, they will base it on their own self worth and example it monetarily. It goes into that people only see in others what they see in themselves. If a person feels bad and sees the flaws in them self, that’s exactly what that person will see in you as their server, acquaintance, friend and even family. How do you think your tip will come out then?, regardless of how you feel about yourself. Actually, there have been times where I’m feeling great about myself and performing really well and a guest will resent me for it showing how much they feel I’m worth to them. However, if someone sees all the good in things then they happen to see the good in you, even if you may feel badly about yourself.
Recently, I served a guest who made a menu choice overly complicated that she was even confusing herself. Had I a low self worth I could have lost my patience or set judgement on her [lowing my vibration] which would result in an discomfort between her and I- creating an disconnect from the rest of her party- resulting in very little money, a heavy head, sulking, seeking approval from co-workers, and so on... Instead, I merely looked at her with a smile and said “Let’s not make this complicated. Here’s what you can do...” and simply gave her clarity on her inquiry. Granted she was making it difficult and the rest of the party, I gather, knows her to do this. I did it with love and received over 20% gratuity from both couples. It’s so easy!
In essence, you can’t win em all. Like energy attracts like energy. In retrospect, you’ll attract those into your world that resemble your energy. It’s time to be honest with yourself and figure out if it’s positive or negative energy. As I see it, the positive people have the most money and are grateful for receiving a service. They’ll pay top dollar to receive great service and I am the one to give it to them. In my experience, they are usually confident, outgoing, outspoken, leaders, doers, givers, etc.. all of positive energy. They are the conduits of flow; givers. I’m always striving to be that to attract that. If there is a negativity, (not that I don’t have that either) those same type of people will relate and enter your world. In my experience, negative people usually hold on to their money and their grudges, have a low self worth and insult others to make themselves feel better. They are the stoppers of flow; takers.
So like any game you play, it takes two players and skill to come out on top. Luck has very little to do with it. When you are the love for yourself to bring to the table and make it completely worth your while, you come out on top. When you make it a win win, you are the king or queen of times. You’re in the zone. You’re in the flow. You are in the moment. You are the love of service and the service of love. You are giving and receiving rather than taking. You are honest. You are one with what is. And when you operate from this space of present moment consciousness, you are ultimately making “Good Money.”
Thank you for taking the time to read my blog posts. I do appreciate all comments and feedback so that I may better your experience and enhance my writing. Feel free to contact me on Facebook or leave a comment below.
Scotty Jay
Like any game, there are two players. Take into account that all of the players are responsible for the outcome of the game. If a person perceives you as loving and possess a high self worth, they will base it on their own self worth and example it monetarily. It goes into that people only see in others what they see in themselves. If a person feels bad and sees the flaws in them self, that’s exactly what that person will see in you as their server, acquaintance, friend and even family. How do you think your tip will come out then?, regardless of how you feel about yourself. Actually, there have been times where I’m feeling great about myself and performing really well and a guest will resent me for it showing how much they feel I’m worth to them. However, if someone sees all the good in things then they happen to see the good in you, even if you may feel badly about yourself.
Recently, I served a guest who made a menu choice overly complicated that she was even confusing herself. Had I a low self worth I could have lost my patience or set judgement on her [lowing my vibration] which would result in an discomfort between her and I- creating an disconnect from the rest of her party- resulting in very little money, a heavy head, sulking, seeking approval from co-workers, and so on... Instead, I merely looked at her with a smile and said “Let’s not make this complicated. Here’s what you can do...” and simply gave her clarity on her inquiry. Granted she was making it difficult and the rest of the party, I gather, knows her to do this. I did it with love and received over 20% gratuity from both couples. It’s so easy!
In essence, you can’t win em all. Like energy attracts like energy. In retrospect, you’ll attract those into your world that resemble your energy. It’s time to be honest with yourself and figure out if it’s positive or negative energy. As I see it, the positive people have the most money and are grateful for receiving a service. They’ll pay top dollar to receive great service and I am the one to give it to them. In my experience, they are usually confident, outgoing, outspoken, leaders, doers, givers, etc.. all of positive energy. They are the conduits of flow; givers. I’m always striving to be that to attract that. If there is a negativity, (not that I don’t have that either) those same type of people will relate and enter your world. In my experience, negative people usually hold on to their money and their grudges, have a low self worth and insult others to make themselves feel better. They are the stoppers of flow; takers.
So like any game you play, it takes two players and skill to come out on top. Luck has very little to do with it. When you are the love for yourself to bring to the table and make it completely worth your while, you come out on top. When you make it a win win, you are the king or queen of times. You’re in the zone. You’re in the flow. You are in the moment. You are the love of service and the service of love. You are giving and receiving rather than taking. You are honest. You are one with what is. And when you operate from this space of present moment consciousness, you are ultimately making “Good Money.”
Thank you for taking the time to read my blog posts. I do appreciate all comments and feedback so that I may better your experience and enhance my writing. Feel free to contact me on Facebook or leave a comment below.
Scotty Jay
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Live Free or Die Tryin
Let’s be honest, ie, to be one with what is. True honesty at it’s best is to simply be. When one receives any sort of tip or gratuity, simply be honest with the result and move along. It’s great to get excited for an abundant tip. One could carry that energy for the rest of the night. On the other hand, it’s difficult to get over a lost or lousy tip. It inflicts our ego when someone didn’t think we were good enough to compensate us for our service. Then start on the why’s of the situation. The funny thing that stems from this is that we already know why. The connection just wasn’t there. That’s just fine for me. I know I can’t please everyone all the time, but as long as I come from love, I can win over more and more people. This is the beginning of the many factors that go into the psychology of tipping.
Expectations lead to disappointment. I’ll just say that right out. People come to restaurants with expectations written all over them. But it’s not their expectations but rather your standard you want to be conscious of. As a server, set a standard for yourself and live up to it. We also have expectations of our guests; like we’re supposed to get 18% on every table no matter what. It’s pure judgement; but only you are only accountable for you. People pay for the food but they buy the service! That’s your queue. When you have a high standard then people will get that through an exchange of energy called service. (Remember how money is energy) They know they are going to buy food but they haven’t determined the gratuity until the fat lady sings. The tip is feedback; priceless!
Service is also considered to be the highest form of love. Think of when you gladly help out the people in your circle of influence; why do you do it? Love is a ‘Give and Receive’ relationship. It’s important to mentally note how the guests are responding to you; what they’re giving and receiving from you and what you are giving and receiving from them. It doesn’t matter how much resistance I receive from my guests, I always come from the space of love and service. This being a cause, to provide great service. The effect: great money. All the steps in between are all the ‘why’s that we beat ourselves up with trying to figure it out. The truth is we’re only paid what we’re worth. We have the capability to be worth more or worth less (worthless) depending upon how we feel about ourselves. Keep cool and unruffled; do not let the opinion of others determine your self-worth.
Once, I received a message on the bill that read “Here’s a tip for you, Scott..” I didn’t even proceed to read the rest of it. I knew it was someone who was angry that I had not lived up to THEIR expectations. I knew that if I had read it and taken it personally, it would have let that person’s opinion affect my self determined worth. Let’s face the facts: that's going to happen no matter what! So why let it be such a burden on yourself? Even with just no tip, feelings of low self worth come into play. I’ve let such actions ruin my entire night before, even after I’ve left the restaurant. I chose into it.
Choosing to struggle over the ‘why’ of the situation keeps ones energy down. When energy is down, we take it from other people to harness for ourselves. This is called being a taker. In the act of love being a give and receive exchange of energy, being a taker puts a stop to the flow; thus creating a result that people ‘in flow’ don’t want to be around. I’ve spent 20 years of my life stopping flow and not being honest with the results until the past few years. It’s all a matter of perception. Trust yourself to know the answer instead of struggling over it like I have and still sometimes do. Know for a fact that people can feel that judgement of yourself reflecting on them. Every cause has an effect, you want the effect to be making “good money.” The cause lies deep within how you feel about yourself. Be honest and ask yourself “How do I truly feel about myself?”
The first step to living free, or you'll just die trying.
To be continued...
Until next time, Gadget!...
Expectations lead to disappointment. I’ll just say that right out. People come to restaurants with expectations written all over them. But it’s not their expectations but rather your standard you want to be conscious of. As a server, set a standard for yourself and live up to it. We also have expectations of our guests; like we’re supposed to get 18% on every table no matter what. It’s pure judgement; but only you are only accountable for you. People pay for the food but they buy the service! That’s your queue. When you have a high standard then people will get that through an exchange of energy called service. (Remember how money is energy) They know they are going to buy food but they haven’t determined the gratuity until the fat lady sings. The tip is feedback; priceless!
Service is also considered to be the highest form of love. Think of when you gladly help out the people in your circle of influence; why do you do it? Love is a ‘Give and Receive’ relationship. It’s important to mentally note how the guests are responding to you; what they’re giving and receiving from you and what you are giving and receiving from them. It doesn’t matter how much resistance I receive from my guests, I always come from the space of love and service. This being a cause, to provide great service. The effect: great money. All the steps in between are all the ‘why’s that we beat ourselves up with trying to figure it out. The truth is we’re only paid what we’re worth. We have the capability to be worth more or worth less (worthless) depending upon how we feel about ourselves. Keep cool and unruffled; do not let the opinion of others determine your self-worth.
Once, I received a message on the bill that read “Here’s a tip for you, Scott..” I didn’t even proceed to read the rest of it. I knew it was someone who was angry that I had not lived up to THEIR expectations. I knew that if I had read it and taken it personally, it would have let that person’s opinion affect my self determined worth. Let’s face the facts: that's going to happen no matter what! So why let it be such a burden on yourself? Even with just no tip, feelings of low self worth come into play. I’ve let such actions ruin my entire night before, even after I’ve left the restaurant. I chose into it.
Choosing to struggle over the ‘why’ of the situation keeps ones energy down. When energy is down, we take it from other people to harness for ourselves. This is called being a taker. In the act of love being a give and receive exchange of energy, being a taker puts a stop to the flow; thus creating a result that people ‘in flow’ don’t want to be around. I’ve spent 20 years of my life stopping flow and not being honest with the results until the past few years. It’s all a matter of perception. Trust yourself to know the answer instead of struggling over it like I have and still sometimes do. Know for a fact that people can feel that judgement of yourself reflecting on them. Every cause has an effect, you want the effect to be making “good money.” The cause lies deep within how you feel about yourself. Be honest and ask yourself “How do I truly feel about myself?”
The first step to living free, or you'll just die trying.
To be continued...
Until next time, Gadget!...
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Breaking Benjamins
He that is of the opinion money will do everything may well be suspected of doing everything for money.
- Benjamin Franklin
Often I hear language that makes this profession entirely about the money. We as a society mostly revolve around the having, obtaining, acquiring and making of money. Yet one does not evaluate the cause and effect of making money. I ask people “Why do you serve?” “Because it’s good money” is usually the answer and often times they are even bewildered at such a question. It was even my answer for many years when I first got in the game. Now as I see it, I have one of the greatest jobs; to hang out with people while I bring them food. It’s pretty simple when I leave money out of the equation.
Money isn’t the cause, money is the effect. Ask yourself ‘what is the cause of making money?’ And more specifically, what is YOUR cause? The flow of money is determined by the energy behind it. Money IS energy and big money follows big energy. One only earns the amount of money in accordance to their energy. There in lies the the matter of choice; you choose the cause or the effect. Have you ever noticed how you are not at all thrilled by your server if they aren’t putting any energy into their job? Why be here at all? There’s a perfectly suiting position waiting for that person working customer service calls in a call center. You get out what you put in, or (the old saying) you reap what you sow. So find the cause... and the effect is up to you, the server.
Letting money be the cause that creates the effect contributes to feelings of loss, jealousy, greed, worry and fear. Feeling like the world owes you is letting money be the cause. It’s amazing how powerful it is. Have you noticed that people who hate money are usually people who don’t have much of it? Or can never get control of it? It’s tied to being the root of all evil. When statements like this are said, the focus is on the money being the cause (root) creating the effect (evil). Money is a great thing in abundance and substantial to society. Think of how many people, organizations and societies are blessed, not by the money itself, but what it can do for communities. There’s always enough of it to go around.
Physically, money is just strips of special paper and ink made valuable only by the society in which we live. Our conditioning is the only thing that gives it it’s worth. How much is foreign money worth to you? It’s the same thing, isn’t it? Let go of the mental conditioning that focuses our minds to know how much it’s worth and focus on how much YOU the individual service provider are worth. I configure how much I’m worth in a dollar amount per hour of contribution I put in. When I set my time to value ratio, I can see the results of what I’m sowing and configure ways where I reap more value by being honest about the results. In fact, I never count my tips as I receive them. To me, this is a relative way of staying attached to money. Letting go and letting it come has been the best result. I can always feel how much I made by the end of the night and I’m never far off if not over.
Letting go of the expectations and simply focusing on connecting with people puts one in the flow of money. Expectations are what keeps the brain stuck on whether it’s good or bad money. Well, it’s just money. People always ask “Did you make money?” “Did you make good money?” I say “Yes, I always make money.” It’s true! Even if I made $30, I still made money, and oh baby was it good! That’s $30+ from before I started. It’s exactly what I deserved at that moment in time due to the the circumstances. If you’re making ‘good’ money and having a good night, which is the cause and which is the effect? You want to ask yourself which comes first when you get in the flow. When money is the cause and not the effect, it becomes a consuming focus of energy and we forget why we are here in the first place; to give great service!
What is ‘good’ money? Vs ‘bad’? Is it possible to make bad money? Is it cursed if it’s bad? Is it blessed if it’s good? In that case, all money earned is good. I’ve never looked at a paycheck and said “Hey, this is bad money!” If I felt that way, that puts me in the effect of feeling that I’m owed. (going back to before) Any money received is good money. It’s a blessing to even receive money at all. This is why it’s called “gratuity.” It’s a form of gratitude for receiving great service. It’s a give and receive relationship and it’s not just on a restaurant level; it’s not just on a workforce level; it’s a larger universal scale. Think big, act big, receive big. It’s the game of life! What a prosperous moment to know that. Because we only get what we deserve and it shows in our value of service. If you feel, not just good, but great about yourself, the effect is people will feel great about you too. It’s a the cycle, the flow, the zone, the game, and you’re in it!
- Benjamin Franklin
Often I hear language that makes this profession entirely about the money. We as a society mostly revolve around the having, obtaining, acquiring and making of money. Yet one does not evaluate the cause and effect of making money. I ask people “Why do you serve?” “Because it’s good money” is usually the answer and often times they are even bewildered at such a question. It was even my answer for many years when I first got in the game. Now as I see it, I have one of the greatest jobs; to hang out with people while I bring them food. It’s pretty simple when I leave money out of the equation.
Money isn’t the cause, money is the effect. Ask yourself ‘what is the cause of making money?’ And more specifically, what is YOUR cause? The flow of money is determined by the energy behind it. Money IS energy and big money follows big energy. One only earns the amount of money in accordance to their energy. There in lies the the matter of choice; you choose the cause or the effect. Have you ever noticed how you are not at all thrilled by your server if they aren’t putting any energy into their job? Why be here at all? There’s a perfectly suiting position waiting for that person working customer service calls in a call center. You get out what you put in, or (the old saying) you reap what you sow. So find the cause... and the effect is up to you, the server.
Letting money be the cause that creates the effect contributes to feelings of loss, jealousy, greed, worry and fear. Feeling like the world owes you is letting money be the cause. It’s amazing how powerful it is. Have you noticed that people who hate money are usually people who don’t have much of it? Or can never get control of it? It’s tied to being the root of all evil. When statements like this are said, the focus is on the money being the cause (root) creating the effect (evil). Money is a great thing in abundance and substantial to society. Think of how many people, organizations and societies are blessed, not by the money itself, but what it can do for communities. There’s always enough of it to go around.
Physically, money is just strips of special paper and ink made valuable only by the society in which we live. Our conditioning is the only thing that gives it it’s worth. How much is foreign money worth to you? It’s the same thing, isn’t it? Let go of the mental conditioning that focuses our minds to know how much it’s worth and focus on how much YOU the individual service provider are worth. I configure how much I’m worth in a dollar amount per hour of contribution I put in. When I set my time to value ratio, I can see the results of what I’m sowing and configure ways where I reap more value by being honest about the results. In fact, I never count my tips as I receive them. To me, this is a relative way of staying attached to money. Letting go and letting it come has been the best result. I can always feel how much I made by the end of the night and I’m never far off if not over.
Letting go of the expectations and simply focusing on connecting with people puts one in the flow of money. Expectations are what keeps the brain stuck on whether it’s good or bad money. Well, it’s just money. People always ask “Did you make money?” “Did you make good money?” I say “Yes, I always make money.” It’s true! Even if I made $30, I still made money, and oh baby was it good! That’s $30+ from before I started. It’s exactly what I deserved at that moment in time due to the the circumstances. If you’re making ‘good’ money and having a good night, which is the cause and which is the effect? You want to ask yourself which comes first when you get in the flow. When money is the cause and not the effect, it becomes a consuming focus of energy and we forget why we are here in the first place; to give great service!
What is ‘good’ money? Vs ‘bad’? Is it possible to make bad money? Is it cursed if it’s bad? Is it blessed if it’s good? In that case, all money earned is good. I’ve never looked at a paycheck and said “Hey, this is bad money!” If I felt that way, that puts me in the effect of feeling that I’m owed. (going back to before) Any money received is good money. It’s a blessing to even receive money at all. This is why it’s called “gratuity.” It’s a form of gratitude for receiving great service. It’s a give and receive relationship and it’s not just on a restaurant level; it’s not just on a workforce level; it’s a larger universal scale. Think big, act big, receive big. It’s the game of life! What a prosperous moment to know that. Because we only get what we deserve and it shows in our value of service. If you feel, not just good, but great about yourself, the effect is people will feel great about you too. It’s a the cycle, the flow, the zone, the game, and you’re in it!
Friday, July 23, 2010
You Just Got Owned
This blog is especially catered to those in the service industry to gain insight on making their life as a server more sustainable. It’s tough being expected to please everyone all the time and making a living at it. It’s one of the most challenging sales jobs out there. Whereas in a typical sales position, one must get used to getting a lot of ‘No’s’. It’s easy to let go of a difficult customer. There’s no way I’m going to try and try and try to sell to someone who shows early stages of not buying. However, in this industry, whether we like the guest or not, they are our customer for the next 30-40 minutes.
That authorizes them to treat us as a servant rather than a server. Their personal lackey at their beckoned call. It’s really discouraging in many aspects to have difficult customers that I wish I could just excuse. I’ve gotten myself written up and even fired due to these customers. The world owes them, hence I owe them. Here’s a challenge for you; let it go! If there is anything I ever say to anyone all the time is let it go. Let it go. Let it fucking go and just laugh it off. Here is why this will serve you...
You are in a rush and you are valuable. Valuable to the store and valuable to your guests. If you’re letting the anger take over, you’ve lost control. Which means you’re still in a rush only you’ve lost your value. What’s the result? Letting people get the best of you because they choose to be difficult allows them to own you. Do you ever think of making people upset? How do you feel when you deliberately upset someone or drive them up the wall. You love it! Hell, I’m guilty of it too. We as humans love to push peoples buttons and get a sick sense of satisfaction when we piss someone off. I OWN the person that I’ve upset merely because they are pissed off and I know their hot button.
Now turn the tables. You’re upset. This person pissed you off. You want to spit in their food and fart next to their booth. That person OWNS you! They’ve literally found that button on you that says “Do Not Touch” and they deliberately push it; over and over and over again. Think about what it does for you, for them, for your teammates, your other tables and the restaurant as a whole. It brings your vibration down and sends a ripple effect through the place while this person is getting a jolly off making you their bitch. It’s happened to me and I know it’s happened to you. What comes after that? I don’t have to go into it, but it stinks.
The simplest way to manage yourself in this case is to let it go. These people are easy to spot. I can feel them sucking the life out of me during the initial greet. Telltale signs: little to no eye contact, delayed response, lack of interaction and/or orders drink (and even food) immediately. The thing with these types is they do attempt to bring you down. Is it laughable? Of course it is! Who really expects to get great service when they have nothing to offer you? Not even what amount of money they may give you in the end is worth having to put up with it.
The solution: Breathe. Hold your tongue and strongly anticipate their needs. Keep their drinks full or even bring them two. Check the quality of their food before it goes out and every stupid little sauce they can ever want is available in a second. Have their bill ready to get them the hell out of there before they create a stir of negative energy among your other tables and turn them against you. That's a synergistic connection that I’ll talk about another time. Keep them up and that keeps them off your back; free to spend quality time with the other tables that deserve your valued service, kindness and friendship. It also allows you to block off that negative synergy being broadcast by this bad apple. Play it cool and unruffled. You’ll have your head in the game, more money in your pockets, and best of all, you will own them.
That authorizes them to treat us as a servant rather than a server. Their personal lackey at their beckoned call. It’s really discouraging in many aspects to have difficult customers that I wish I could just excuse. I’ve gotten myself written up and even fired due to these customers. The world owes them, hence I owe them. Here’s a challenge for you; let it go! If there is anything I ever say to anyone all the time is let it go. Let it go. Let it fucking go and just laugh it off. Here is why this will serve you...
You are in a rush and you are valuable. Valuable to the store and valuable to your guests. If you’re letting the anger take over, you’ve lost control. Which means you’re still in a rush only you’ve lost your value. What’s the result? Letting people get the best of you because they choose to be difficult allows them to own you. Do you ever think of making people upset? How do you feel when you deliberately upset someone or drive them up the wall. You love it! Hell, I’m guilty of it too. We as humans love to push peoples buttons and get a sick sense of satisfaction when we piss someone off. I OWN the person that I’ve upset merely because they are pissed off and I know their hot button.
Now turn the tables. You’re upset. This person pissed you off. You want to spit in their food and fart next to their booth. That person OWNS you! They’ve literally found that button on you that says “Do Not Touch” and they deliberately push it; over and over and over again. Think about what it does for you, for them, for your teammates, your other tables and the restaurant as a whole. It brings your vibration down and sends a ripple effect through the place while this person is getting a jolly off making you their bitch. It’s happened to me and I know it’s happened to you. What comes after that? I don’t have to go into it, but it stinks.
The simplest way to manage yourself in this case is to let it go. These people are easy to spot. I can feel them sucking the life out of me during the initial greet. Telltale signs: little to no eye contact, delayed response, lack of interaction and/or orders drink (and even food) immediately. The thing with these types is they do attempt to bring you down. Is it laughable? Of course it is! Who really expects to get great service when they have nothing to offer you? Not even what amount of money they may give you in the end is worth having to put up with it.
The solution: Breathe. Hold your tongue and strongly anticipate their needs. Keep their drinks full or even bring them two. Check the quality of their food before it goes out and every stupid little sauce they can ever want is available in a second. Have their bill ready to get them the hell out of there before they create a stir of negative energy among your other tables and turn them against you. That's a synergistic connection that I’ll talk about another time. Keep them up and that keeps them off your back; free to spend quality time with the other tables that deserve your valued service, kindness and friendship. It also allows you to block off that negative synergy being broadcast by this bad apple. Play it cool and unruffled. You’ll have your head in the game, more money in your pockets, and best of all, you will own them.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
An Introduction
The articles written here are solely from my own personal experience and my opinions may not reflect that of yours or any other in the service industry. Your opinions to me matter whether they agree or disagree with mine. I am open to all insight. I write to release. It is good for the soul as it brings subconscious thought to the conscious world which makes it a reality. I choose to write this blog as a gift to my fellow food servers who cry out to themselves that “there’s gotta be something more!” or even the ‘I-hate-this-job servers’ that have been there for so many years. This is for you.
When I write, I feel it comes from wisdom. On my journey of personal enlightenment, I’ve come to see that service is the highest form of love. And whether you like it or not, you are in sales. Now you may not love to serve, in fact most servers dislike their jobs. Though, when I am serving someone in my section, they are guest; as in a guest in my home. There’s a server mentality about that says we only have to do the minimum requirements. I learned to let go of what I think I and others should do and simply did what is best for my personal growth. I found myself making more money, getting more assistance, and getting everything I know I deserve. So can you.
I’ve been in and out of the food service industry for nearly nine years to count. Now that’s nothing to brag about but I know my way around the environment. The places can be a very negative force, clique-y and overall frustrating. There’s great days and horrible days. You know those horrible dreams about serving and falling behind on every little step? Ugh! That’s the subconscious sending you a message of some sort. Remember the rewarding days. Making 20% or more of the sales we have just accrued. Meeting that awesome person. Even getting a phone number from an attractive customer. We’ve all been there too. Regardless of our failures and successes, the important thing is to focus on the present. Now is the time!
The bottom line is we are here to make money! As much as I don’t care for money being the cause, (because it’s not) it is, however, the source of our means of being. We all would like to make more money, right? I know that I do! Everyday I strive to practice methods that I know increase my income. It’s not the amount of tables I take at once nor is it the particular section I’m working. It comes down to one simple word: Attitude. This key aspect in any forms of service or sales is imperative to practice. A great attitude means great money.
In this blog I look to assist others in the food service industry to achieve the results that they deserve and make it through, not just this industry, but in life... or any endeavor. Because we all want to make more money. My purpose is to provide insight and information on mindset, challenges and creating possibilities for those of us who have a love-hate relationship with this line of work and ultimately...
Serve the Server.
Enjoy the read and pass it along.
When I write, I feel it comes from wisdom. On my journey of personal enlightenment, I’ve come to see that service is the highest form of love. And whether you like it or not, you are in sales. Now you may not love to serve, in fact most servers dislike their jobs. Though, when I am serving someone in my section, they are guest; as in a guest in my home. There’s a server mentality about that says we only have to do the minimum requirements. I learned to let go of what I think I and others should do and simply did what is best for my personal growth. I found myself making more money, getting more assistance, and getting everything I know I deserve. So can you.
I’ve been in and out of the food service industry for nearly nine years to count. Now that’s nothing to brag about but I know my way around the environment. The places can be a very negative force, clique-y and overall frustrating. There’s great days and horrible days. You know those horrible dreams about serving and falling behind on every little step? Ugh! That’s the subconscious sending you a message of some sort. Remember the rewarding days. Making 20% or more of the sales we have just accrued. Meeting that awesome person. Even getting a phone number from an attractive customer. We’ve all been there too. Regardless of our failures and successes, the important thing is to focus on the present. Now is the time!
The bottom line is we are here to make money! As much as I don’t care for money being the cause, (because it’s not) it is, however, the source of our means of being. We all would like to make more money, right? I know that I do! Everyday I strive to practice methods that I know increase my income. It’s not the amount of tables I take at once nor is it the particular section I’m working. It comes down to one simple word: Attitude. This key aspect in any forms of service or sales is imperative to practice. A great attitude means great money.
In this blog I look to assist others in the food service industry to achieve the results that they deserve and make it through, not just this industry, but in life... or any endeavor. Because we all want to make more money. My purpose is to provide insight and information on mindset, challenges and creating possibilities for those of us who have a love-hate relationship with this line of work and ultimately...
Serve the Server.
Enjoy the read and pass it along.
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