Breaking Benjamins

He that is of the opinion money will do everything may well be suspected of doing everything for money. 
- Benjamin Franklin

Often I hear language that makes this profession entirely about the money. We as a society mostly revolve around the having, obtaining, acquiring and making of money. Yet one does not evaluate the cause and effect of making money. I ask people “Why do you serve?” “Because it’s good money” is usually the answer and often times they are even bewildered at such a question. It was even my answer for many years when I first got in the game. Now as I see it, I have one of the greatest jobs; to hang out with people while I bring them food. It’s pretty simple when I leave money out of the equation.

Money isn’t the cause, money is the effect. Ask yourself ‘what is the cause of making money?’ And more specifically, what is YOUR cause? The flow of money is determined by the energy behind it. Money IS energy and big money follows big energy. One only earns the amount of money in accordance to their energy. There in lies the the matter of choice; you choose the cause or the effect. Have you ever noticed how you are not at all thrilled by your server if they aren’t putting any energy into their job? Why be here at all? There’s a perfectly suiting position waiting for that person working customer service calls in a call center. You get out what you put in, or (the old saying) you reap what you sow. So find the cause... and the effect is up to you, the server.

Letting money be the cause that creates the effect contributes to feelings of loss, jealousy, greed, worry and fear. Feeling like the world owes you is letting money be the cause. It’s amazing how powerful it is. Have you noticed that people who hate money are usually people who don’t have much of it? Or can never get control of it? It’s tied to being the root of all evil. When statements like this are said, the focus is on the money being the cause (root) creating the effect (evil). Money is a great thing in abundance and substantial to society. Think of how many people, organizations and societies are blessed, not by the money itself, but what it can do for communities. There’s always enough of it to go around.

Physically, money is just strips of special paper and ink made valuable only by the society in which we live. Our conditioning is the only thing that gives it it’s worth. How much is foreign money worth to you? It’s the same thing, isn’t it? Let go of the mental conditioning that focuses our minds to know how much it’s worth and focus on how much YOU the individual service provider are worth. I configure how much I’m worth in a dollar amount per hour of contribution I put in. When I set my time to value ratio, I can see the results of what I’m sowing and configure ways where I reap more value by being honest about the results. In fact, I never count my tips as I receive them. To me, this is a relative way of staying attached to money. Letting go and letting it come has been the best result. I can always feel how much I made by the end of the night and I’m never far off if not over.

Letting go of the expectations and simply focusing on connecting with people puts one in the flow of money. Expectations are what keeps the brain stuck on whether it’s good or bad money. Well, it’s just money. People always ask “Did you make money?”  “Did you make good money?” I say “Yes, I always make money.” It’s true! Even if I made $30, I still made money, and oh baby was it good! That’s $30+ from before I started. It’s exactly what I deserved at that moment in time due to the the circumstances. If you’re making ‘good’ money and having a good night, which is the cause and which is the effect? You want to ask yourself which comes first when you get in the flow. When money is the cause and not the effect, it becomes a consuming focus of energy and we forget why we are here in the first place; to give great service!

What is ‘good’ money? Vs ‘bad’? Is it possible to make bad money? Is it cursed if it’s bad? Is it blessed if it’s good? In that case, all money earned is good. I’ve never looked at a paycheck and said “Hey, this is bad money!” If I felt that way, that puts me in the effect of feeling that I’m owed. (going back to before) Any money received is good money. It’s a blessing to even receive money at all. This is why it’s called “gratuity.” It’s a form of gratitude for receiving great service. It’s a give and receive relationship and it’s not just on a restaurant level; it’s not just on a workforce level; it’s a larger universal scale. Think big, act big, receive big. It’s the game of life! What a prosperous moment to know that. Because we only get what we deserve and it shows in our value of service. If you feel, not just good, but great about yourself, the effect is people will feel great about you too. It’s a the cycle, the flow, the zone, the game, and you’re in it!

You Just Got Owned

This blog is especially catered to those in the service industry to gain insight on making their life as a server more sustainable. It’s tough being expected to please everyone all the time and making a living at it. It’s one of the most challenging sales jobs out there. Whereas in a typical sales position, one must get used to getting a lot of ‘No’s’. It’s easy to let go of a difficult customer. There’s no way I’m going to try and try and try to sell to someone who shows early stages of not buying. However, in this industry, whether we like the guest or not, they are our customer for the next 30-40 minutes.

That authorizes them to treat us as a servant rather than a server. Their personal lackey at their beckoned call. It’s really discouraging in many aspects to have difficult customers that I wish I could just excuse. I’ve gotten myself written up and even fired due to these customers. The world owes them, hence I owe them. Here’s a challenge for you; let it go! If there is anything I ever say to anyone all the time is let it go. Let it go. Let it fucking go and just laugh it off. Here is why this will serve you...

You are in a rush and you are valuable. Valuable to the store and valuable to your guests. If you’re letting the anger take over, you’ve lost control. Which means you’re still in a rush only you’ve lost your value. What’s the result? Letting people get the best of you because they choose to be difficult allows them to own you. Do you ever think of making people upset? How do you feel when you deliberately upset someone or drive them up the wall. You love it! Hell, I’m guilty of it too. We as humans love to push peoples buttons and get a sick sense of satisfaction when we piss someone off. I OWN the person that I’ve upset merely because they are pissed off and I know their hot button.

Now turn the tables. You’re upset. This person pissed you off. You want to spit in their food and fart next to their booth. That person OWNS you! They’ve literally found that button on you that says “Do Not Touch” and they deliberately push it; over and over and over again. Think about what it does for you, for them, for your teammates, your other tables and the restaurant as a whole. It brings your vibration down and sends a ripple effect through the place while this person is getting a jolly off making you their bitch. It’s happened to me and I know it’s happened to you.  What comes after that? I don’t have to go into it, but it stinks.

The simplest way to manage yourself in this case is to let it go. These people are easy to spot. I can feel them sucking the life out of me during the initial greet. Telltale signs: little to no eye contact, delayed response, lack of interaction and/or orders drink (and even food) immediately. The thing with these types is they do attempt to bring you down. Is it laughable? Of course it is! Who really expects to get great service when they have nothing to offer you? Not even what amount of money they may give you in the end is worth having to put up with it.

The solution: Breathe. Hold your tongue and strongly anticipate their needs. Keep their drinks full or even bring them two. Check the quality of their food before it goes out and every stupid little sauce they can ever want is available in a second. Have their bill ready to get them the hell out of there before they create a stir of negative energy among your other tables and turn them against you. That's a synergistic connection that I’ll talk about another time. Keep them up and that keeps them off your back; free to spend quality time with the other tables that deserve your valued service, kindness and friendship. It also allows you to block off that negative synergy being broadcast by this bad apple. Play it cool and unruffled. You’ll have your head in the game, more money in your pockets, and best of all, you will own them.

An Introduction

The articles written here are solely from my own personal experience and my opinions may not reflect that of yours or any other in the service industry. Your opinions to me matter whether they agree or disagree with mine. I am open to all insight. I write to release. It is good for the soul as it brings subconscious thought to the conscious world which makes it a reality. I choose to write this blog as a gift to my fellow food servers who cry out to themselves that “there’s gotta be something more!” or even the ‘I-hate-this-job servers’ that have been there for so many years. This is for you.

When I write, I feel it comes from wisdom. On my journey of personal enlightenment, I’ve come to see that service is the highest form of love. And whether you like it or not, you are in sales. Now you may not love to serve, in fact most servers dislike their jobs. Though, when I am serving someone in my section, they are guest; as in a guest in my home. There’s a server mentality about that says we only have to do the minimum requirements. I learned to let go of what I think I and others should do and simply did what is best for my personal growth. I found myself making more money, getting more assistance, and getting everything I know I deserve. So can you.

I’ve been in and out of the food service industry for nearly nine years to count. Now that’s nothing to brag about but I know my way around the environment. The places can be a very negative force, clique-y and overall frustrating. There’s great days and horrible days. You know those horrible dreams about serving and falling behind on every little step? Ugh! That’s the subconscious sending you a message of some sort. Remember the rewarding days. Making 20% or more of the sales we have just accrued. Meeting that awesome person. Even getting a phone number from an attractive customer. We’ve all been there too. Regardless of our failures and successes, the important thing is to focus on the present. Now is the time!

The bottom line is we are here to make money! As much as I don’t care for money being the cause, (because it’s not) it is, however, the source of our means of being. We all would like to make more money, right? I know that I do! Everyday I strive to practice methods that I know increase my income. It’s not the amount of tables I take at once nor is it the particular section I’m working. It comes down to one simple word: Attitude. This key aspect in any forms of service or sales is imperative to practice. A great attitude means great money.

In this blog I look to assist others in the food service industry to achieve the results that they deserve and make it through, not just this industry, but in life... or any endeavor. Because we all want to make more money. My purpose is to provide insight and information on mindset, challenges and creating possibilities for those of us who have a love-hate relationship with this line of work and ultimately...

Serve the Server.
Enjoy the read and pass it along.